Last week our revival group pastor Abi spoke to all the girls about beauty and her personal testimony and story of how the Lord took her on a beauty journey. She is such an amazing, strong, stunning, powerful woman and it was such a privilege to learn from her. The following paragraphs are some thoughts and reflections on beauty/body image based on what impacted me from last week.
Would you ever abuse a friend until she behaved perfectly or looked the way you wanted her to? Would you criticize, punish, and verbally assault her only to turn around and ask her to do a favor for you? We all read this and think: Of course I wouldn't! That sounds terrible! -but the truth is: so many of us do this to our bodies. We love our bodies conditionally and only accept them when we think they are 'perfect'. We are mean to them and overly critical, yet put unrealistic demands of them at the same time. Loving our bodies with no strings attached is so important as a woman because we go through many changes. Puberty, pregnancy, weight fluctuations, and menopause create very unique hormonal adjustments that are part of every woman's life.
The sad thing is, even people who have 'perfect' figures have flaws that they would like to change. Some of the most insecure women on the planet are those who have taken every measure to preserve and change their looks only to realize later there are still things they don't like about themselves physically. If you cannot love your body unconditionally, you will never find peace. Changing that 'one thing' that bothers you just might be masking the root issue that you do not accept yourself.
This is not to say we should never do our hair and make-up, eat whatever we want, and be lazy, but if we love who we are, we will want to care for ourselves. I love to work out (when I'm not pregnant) and this is because I know I am worth it and it blesses my physical health. I also enjoy when I am able to get my nails done or a facial, but in this season of life being in ministry school does not financially allow me to indulge. That's ok though! I still feel beautiful because I've already made up my mind to treat myself as such! Do you see the difference?- I do not take care of myself because I think it will make me beautiful. I take care of myself because I see myself as beautiful and want to steward my beauty.
Abi (my Bethel pastor)also shared about body reconciliation. This is totally new to me, but has to do with actually speaking to our bodies, being in touch with what they need, and repenting for not being a good friend to ourself. I have began to declare love over my body (speaking to parts by name) and blessing it. Gratefulness is key. We should be the safest place for ourselves. We should be such a refuge from the onslaught of media images that define what the perfect body should look like. I am an advocate for my own body and when I love myself I empower those around me to more fully embrace who they are.
One thing Abi does with people she counsels is has them go through magazines and look for women who have similar features to what they don't like about themselves (i.e. big hips, small breasts, big breasts, short, tall- whatever they are struggling with) that they find beautiful. They cut out these pictures as an exercise in redefining what beauty is.
I personally was so impacted by they idea of blessing our bodies and partnering with them. Being pregnant, I am experiencing a ton of physical changes that I would have thought would be really difficult for me since I have been blessed with being naturally slender. But I have committed to partnering with myself during this time and telling my body, "you go ahead and do what you need to do to sustain life... If you need to gain 30 lbs during this pregnancy I bless you, if you need to gain more, I'm still going to accept you." It is actually quite revolutionary because I find myself just so grateful I have a healthy body and the even more revolutionary outcome is I can see my body responding. I have struggled since I was 14 with acne, but I have been speaking life and acceptance to my skin and it has actually cleared up some! It's still not perfect, but that isn't even the goal because I no longer expect perfection out of myself.
So friends, I challenge you to love who you were made to be. I even dare you to try speaking life and acceptance to your body out loud and watch how your perspective and attitude changes. You may even reap some physical blessings that come from not punishing yourself. Psalm 139 tells us how we are fearfully and wonderfully made and guess what?! I believe what God says about me :) MY BODY ROCKS- and so does yours!
