Do you ever just have an off day? I am happy to report that I have less "funk" days the older I get and the more I mature- but yesterday was one of those days. My baby was fussy and teething, my husband was home for only a day before leaving for a work trip, and I felt tired. Urg, can anyone say #funkcity??? Crap, I could feel myself getting sad mid-day, bracing for my husband leaving and missing him even though he was with me. Then I was irritated with myself for being sad on the one day he was in town... dysfunctional cycle... actually, let's hashtag that sucker #dysfunctionalcycle...
I cried in the car after we had to leave Starbucks early because Theo was fussing... I cried, ok,- you caught me, I sobbed. I told him we should maybe only have two kids so that I could have enough quality time in the future- DARN having "quality time" as my #1 love language- there are just no short cuts to filling my love tank!!! If I wasn't sure I couldn't be pregnant I probably would have thought I was! Nope, just living life imperfectly.....
Paul (who is a pro by now at handling emotions) just spoke life over me- told me that this day doesn't define me, that I am a powerful person who can handle life, etc. That popped me out of my funk about being apart the coming week and I was able to enjoy the rest of the night with him.
So today, guess what happens?!! I meet a wonderful, sweet woman from Kenya at a birthday party. She and I start talking and lo and behold, she has been living away from her husband for SEVEN year... yes, SEVEN years. She is here going to nursing school, working, and sending home money to Kenya. By herself. She has 2 kids- also still in Africa. She came to Omaha not knowing anyone or anything about American culture... She looked at me with tears in her eyes saying that she missed her husband, but she was strong and had deepened her relationship with the Lord. "He's all I've had. I thought I knew God before this experience, but no, now I know God. This time has brought me so close to Him." I stood there literally having an encounter with gratitude just talking to her. I asked her if I could hug her and said that I was pretty sure God had sent her to tell me her story at the perfect time.
Nothing like a little perspective. So tonight I came home, I tucked my baby into bed. I called my husband and told him how thankful I am for our life together. Now I am laying in bed, praying for my new friend and grateful for the opportunity to live my life with more joy.
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