I am not a clueless person. The last almost 34 weeks I have watched my body grow and stretch to unusual proportions, but yesterday it just hit me that I am actually going to have a baby next month. The reality of that is the most exciting and crazy thought, but it's true- time keeps moving and each second brings Paul and I closer to becoming a family of 3.
I want to say that I know I'm going to love being a mom. I can't wait to hold our baby and pray over him and kiss his (maybe?) chubby cheeks. I know Paul will be a great dad because he is the most loving and involved uncle I've ever met. As a matter of fact, he spent last night playing 'tigers' with our two nieces ages 2 and 4. He didn't even complain about his knees hurting or having his face stepped on when his tiger character 'died.' He's got this. I've got this.
Nesting must be what I was feeling yesterday because I got this panicky feeling that the baby was going to pop out at any second and I have NOTHING bought. When I go home this Saturday I think I will rush to Target to use my baby shower gift cards and buy everything I need. I also was freaking out because Puffin still doesn't have a name (eek! only 6ish weeks left!) I just kept feeling this sense of urgency so I just took a really long nap. Then I was upstairs getting ready in the bathroom and Paul came up to check on me and I was fighting back tears (kinda like the whole day) and didn't even know why. He prayed for me and talked me through it (props to him since there was even a Nebraska game on at that time), but it still felt very real. I cried again about 30 minutes later sitting in my mom's bathroom (I like to bathroom hop) cutting my ultra-fast-growing-pregnancy-nails and telling her how overwhelmed I felt. She is the best mom ever *tangent*
She took me to Target and we scoped out everything I need to buy once getting back to Cali. It helped put things in perspective and I felt so much better. I also want to say how grateful I am to her and my sister (and Paul's mom and sisters) for putting on an amazing baby shower (my mom paid for TONS of the food) and made it look easy hosting a houseful. She also cooked for all of us kids and friends non-stop on the break. No joke she went to the grocery store almost everyday. She has taken me shopping, bought baby clothes for us, and let us use her car while here. She is my best friend.
Ok so ending the how-much-I-love-my-mom tangent. My day got better. Paul and I visited his family, went over to our friends the Dotzlers (they are also pregnant and due in less than 2 weeks!), and stopped by at our dear friends Nic and Angie's so he could see everyone before he left today. I feel confident that we are exactly where we are supposed to and that the Lord wanted and planned for our precious baby to be born in the amazing Bethel environment we are experiencing at ministry school. I just had to blog about yesterday because I want to remember that there were hard days too, pregnancy days where your emotions don't follow logic and you feel like you are about to jump off the high dive naked...
Thursday morning my mom and I are going to the Women's Hospital because a family friend Cathy DelSenno teaches birthing/breastfeeding classes and is going to give us a tutorial. SOO excited to learn from here since we haven't had time to take a class out in Redding. I will try and remember any juicy tips to share with you readers that is PG level...
No comments:
Post a Comment